My Dearest Xxxxxxxx,
I actually had something to look forward to. A friend. It was nice to see a familiar face, hear a voice I could relate with. It was a voice I always heard alongside your laughter. I was not myself, not the best way to be around someone, especially not him.
I wish I could have apologised, but I only had enough strength to hold my front. Enough strength to put on a straight face, to hold back my pain, as memories of you flooded my weakened heart. The meeting was short, a perfect ten minutes. To me, all that I truly could have handled. A second more and I would have fallen.
It was good to hear you were alright. It was nice to know that you were fine. I couldn’t keep myself from asking about you. It is a question I never want to ask again, but you cannot imagine the weight of not knowing.
I truly have missed you. I won’t try to gauge it, I know I can’t. It is hard to describe how I truly feel. On one hand, I’m restless, on the other, at peace. I miss you, I hate that you are not around. Everyday, I feel myself gaining strength, but I am struggling to get off my addiction.
My drug, You.