Day 75

by markvnathan

My Dearest Xxxxxxxx,

Yesterday was a challenge. I am proud that I got through it, that I resisted the temptation to give in. It was difficult in every sense of the word, but you were my saving grace yet again.

You have this way with me, and I still can’t quite figure out why. You make me smile in ways you can’t imagine, you make me laugh for no reason at all. It’s a cross between sounding crazy and knowing it’s absolutely fine, just because you’re in love. I can’t look at any moment in life the same way, not anymore.

Every sunset, every sunrise, become moments where I wish you were right beside me. The clouds in the sky seem to form your face, the stars spell out your name. Every moment seems to be a bit more special, when I imagine it with you.

I don’t want to live my life this way. It isn’t right. I need to live life for myself. Make my own memories, my own moments. Life should be sweet without you. At the very moment I get there, when I truly am ready to be that man, You would be that icing on my cake.

You would be that pillar, that smile I come home to every day, for the rest of my life. I would be everything you needed and you mine. I would love you endlessly, not a moment less.

As much of a mess that this has all come to, it is the single most memorable experience that I have ever been through. I can’t imagine my life at this very moment, with anyone else. Maybe that will pass, maybe it won’t.

Time will tell.

Yours Always,