Day 63

by markvnathan

My Dearest Xxxxxxxx,

The time has come for me to come clean. To say what needs to be said. The truth, no more lies.

The truth is, you hurt me. I was crushed and stepped on. Then, you insulted me. When you broke me, you left. And as I picked up the pieces, you opened a window. With what felt like a raging storm, a gale force wind, I destroyed everything and everyone in my path.

I wanted to hate you, but I could not. I wanted to love you less, but I only did more. Countless nights, I cried, I prayed, but I had no answer. You asked me what was wrong? You asked me to share what I had to go through? But you could never know. You would never understand.

I’ll say it again. You need the truth, no more lies.

The truth is, I fell in love with you. Head over heels. I fell for you like I have never with anyone else before. I put You, before me. I put You, before anything else in my life.

You said that we would know when the right person came along, that commitment would be easy. You were right, I chose you. I didn’t want anyone but you. I wanted to give you my world, my everything, so I did. I shared with you my life, my every insecurity, my darkest secrets.

I took a leap of faith and I loved you with no reason. I loved you not knowing who you were, I loved, a complete stranger. I wanted to spend every single day figuring out how it was possible, but I would be glad.

I understood that I would learn something new about you everyday. It wouldn’t matter if it was good or bad. I would have loved those imperfections, those flaws and embrace every bit of you.

If you needed honesty, I have offered it. If you needed love, I placed my heart in your hands. When you needed freedom, I let you go.

That is the truth. I have nothing to hide from you, not anymore. I have come to terms that there could never be an Us. I have come to terms that I must move on.

You were my first, and I will Never forget.

 

Yours Always,

Mark

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